Yet more reading:
rameumptom postsQuote:
Why do people lose their testimonies? Because they forget to spiritually nurture the testimony they've received, and instead seek for answers from the Tree of Knowledge.
I reject this premise entirely for being incomplete and circular in nature.
There are numerous reasons that a person leaves the LDS church or lose their testimonies. Based on my own experience with leaving the church, I can tell you that I did the best I could to spiritually nurture my testimony. While the deacons quorum adviser, I spent hours each week preparing my lessons. I didn't just read the manual and teach based on that. I spent time reviewing the material and cross-referencing the objectives and critical points of the lesson with the standard works as well as literature found at the church's website.
While on his mission, my cousin would often speak of articles he read at FAIR in his letters home; illustrating one point or another in response to criticism he heard. I would read the articles in their entirety and think about them. Initially I found these articles to be well written. As I started to apply critical thinking skills, I started to develop a case of cognitive dissonance. Some of the articles felt circular in their reasoning. Others felt as though they were particularly harsh or critical of the author of one publication or another. In short, I started to recognize logical fallacies of several flavors. This didn't help relieve the cognitive dissonance I found. ( I have searched through the emails I have saved from his mission to see if I could find the particular articles he was referring to, but I can't seem to find them at this point. It has been 7 years since they were emailed to me.)
Toward the end, I found that I received no enjoyment in preparing and teaching the lessons from the Aaronic Priesthood manual and even some topics I found to be quite disturbing (the "Every Member a Missionary" lesson was quite off putting. Enough that I remember the feeling of disgust that I felt when I read through the manual ... 6 years later.)
At the end of the day I'm of the opinion that in my case it was my own attempts to spiritually nurture my testimony that lead to its eventual demise.
I, of course, can only speak for myself.
The details were different for me in terms of church jobs and whatnot, but I followed a similar trajectory out. I tried for a couple decades--my whole adult life--to "nurture" my testimony. These attempts were increasingly desperate over time. When suddenly the only thing that made sense was that it actually DIDN'T make sense and what was truest was that it WASN'T true. That simplifies a long and difficult process, but that's the basic summary. That whole business about "neglecting" your testimony is just ignorant bollocks, asserted by, I would suspect, people who are whistling in the dark themselves, trying to hold it all together. The thing about this is I've been where they are, but they haven't been where I am. I'm not sure it's even possible from that head-space to project what a post-mormon world view is like.