Oh, the D word. Yes, after living with a physically and emotionally abusive man whom I married in the temple, I and I alone had a two year affair with a man 14 years my junior. It was a stupid thing to do, and nothing good came from it except the divorce, and even that has had long term ramifications. But God, he was just too gorgeous to ignore.
(memory correct?) PP: Didn't you say here that you're bi-polar?
I've done 'The Big A' myself, and I KNOW it was a betrayal, a MISTAKE. I blame my 'wrong thinking' (others call it thinking with the Wrong Head, haha).
IMO, Adultery is a Solid WRONG to be avoided At All Costs....
D is the One Subject I 'agree with the Brotherurine'; More Growth, More good comes from
a) working out problems (except in cases of un-relented, repeating wrongs)
b) staying faithful, emotionally & sexually.