Hi everyone and thanks for all the replies... i really appreciate them so much...
Since that night that i got drunk, and it doesn't seem possible that its been 3 months ago, i've done alot of thinking about the Church, and, mostly about the Jesus that i learned about as a child.
i am just still trying really hard to not live in fear everyday, fear of death, fear of never seeing family and dear friends.
i am trying to just live each day to the best of my ability...i am a good person, very kind hearted and sweet, at least that's what my friends tell me, and in fact, i have been taken advantage of many times due to my gullible nature and desire to help and befriend others.
i hope that "God" will look upon my heart and see the true me and accept me.
i have gotten drunk only one other time since that night...i am bipolar and take bedtime meds that knock me flat out...if i'm feeling scared or anxious, i'll just take them and go to bed and sleep. i enjoy the occasional drink..which i shouldn't do at all due to the meds i take...but hey, i'm not perfect!! and i agree with Susan D....except when you don't remember the experience the next day!!!
thanks again everyone!...my computer's in the hospital, so i only have one hour a day here at the library...i don't think i've written a sober intro yet, but i will!!