Sorry! Sorry! Habit, you know.
I'm John. Born and raised in the church, come from "noble Mormon pioneer stock," served a mission, several callings, leadership, temple wedding, etc.
I left in 1998 and have never looked back.
Honestly, for years, I never really thought much about what it means to be an ex-mormon. I happened to move to another state at the same time I stopped going, so I had the advantage of cutting all church ties and starting fresh. Even later, I moved to another country for 4 years, and really got a chance to see everything from a brand new perspective.
In unrelated events, I got divorced in early 2005 and have been living with my girlfriend since late 2006. She never had any exposure to Mormons, so it's been interesting talking with her about it and the religious culture I was raised in.
It's this that has made me think more about my reasons for leaving the church, the hold that parts of it still has on me (mild as they may be), and yes, even some anger -- not anger aimed at any particular individual, or even at the church itself, but directed at the idea that I was taken in for so long by something that now seems to utterly absurd.
Actually, yes, I do have anger toward the church. The lies, the sexism, the racism, the homophobia, the years of making me feel guilty and inadequate as a human being, the control they had over me, and the money and time they duped me into willingly giving them.
Anyway, I thought it would be interesting for me to join a group of people who have gone through the same things as me. I don't exactly know if I can contribute in any way, but I will try when I can.
Thanks!