Further Light and Knowledge

and i'm not thrilled about it either. yes i know its a free agency choice- this evening, i made the choice to drink...felt much sadness and pain and anxiety. and honestly, just plain wanted to get sloshed, and i did. still, the pain is there, hiding under the intoxication. it'll return in the morning with my hangover.
i really did believe for so long. now, i don't know if i'll ever see my family again. i don't know who or what to trust anymore.
PL

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Searching for the real TRUTH

I look forward to the rest of your story.

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it is truly a small population of people that do not seek control but are willing to accept the outcome of all things. - Mayan

its a long one....sure you want to hear it????
lol
PL

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Searching for the real TRUTH

Please be careful when drinking alone especially at a time like this.

--Steve

Welcome!! I'd like to hear the story too.

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He never said it would be worth it; He only said it would be easy.

hi everyone...
i'm doing ok...a bit depressed, need to cry.
thanks for your concern, Thunderchops.
my computer is in the shop, so i'm at the library and only have one hour a day-ugh!!
will share my story soon. i think i posted a story over on NOM or the Foyer.. under introductions, but i can't be positive if i posted a new topic or under intros..anyways. just saying hello.
PL

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Searching for the real TRUTH

Welcome, and I hope you are feeling better, PL! What do you mean, you won't ever see your family again?

Big green hugs,

Froggie

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"Mormon culture is a combination of well-intentioned naïveté, the Stepford Wives, and the Holy Inquisition." ~Dr.Todd Ormsbee
http://froggey.wordpress.com

what if it, meaning "the church" is true and a person has to do this and that to qualify for the celestial kingdom. my parents' and siblings' temple work has been done...and i just don't know if i'm going to make it b/c i just do not accept everything.
i'm still feeling confused and scared.
PL

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Searching for the real TRUTH

Think about it...If God is really like that...do you really want to be with him anyway?!!! I seriously don't think He is anything like that. If He is there and real...He is not so pissy as the Mormon church makes him out to be. He is GOD after all and I think he is bigger than that. Just my opinon...I have a lot of those...LOL

What I have decided for me is that if He IS like that then I would never make it anyway, but it just doesn't seem the least bit logical to me for God to be that caring of what kind of undies we wear or whether or not the men wear white shirts to go to church or do their home-teaching...or whether or not we spend hours a day chasing our tails for the Mormon church. I think if God is there and loves me personally, that HE knows me way better than some guys in suits in Utah somewhere...

I'm not saying your fears aren't valid, I'm just trying to help by saying that I think a real God wouldn't be so wrapped up in all these little tiny details that the Mormon church has its panties all in a bunch about...

I agree NelleM. I think all the little rituals and rules are there in order to keep people from asking the bigger, more important questions.

Keep the debate going about whether or not Diet Coke is allowed or not so that people don't start asking about the origin of the church or whether or not it's true.

Does anyone really think god cares about Diet Coke (unless ofcourse She has stock in it - then that's a completely different story)?

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Success Warrior
My only Mormon post so far: http://successwarrior.typepad.com/chron ... relig.html
Humor: http://successwarrior.typepad.com/chronicles
Money: http://successwarrior.typepad.com

This is the same conversation I have with my Mom at times.

She has issues with polygamy, tithing, and how judgemental they are, but it's been drilled into her head since she was born. She is convinced that she won't see my Dad again because she wasn't a good enough person to get her temple work done.

I don't believe that for a split second. Neither should anyone else. If you believe in God, then you should believe that God loves everyone, and he has no "special club" for "special believers". It's hogwash.

Don't be depressed because you used your brain You did what many people don't have the courage to do. I am proud of you, you should be proud of yourself.

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http://thestrangetheweirdthewonderful.blogspot.com/

I actually had my first full can of beer on Friday before I saw Superbad (due to the laugh a minute nature of that funny movie) and I'm never having it again. To me, it's just club soda with alcohol. I will always prefer the cocktail drinks and wines. The sweet tooth needs attention.

Speaking of which, I had a mojito drink (Bacardi) for the 1st time recently and absolutely loved it.

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I have a certain curiosity for life that drives me and propels me forward. - Rachel McAdams

PL, sometimes you need to get drunk. Drunk and laid is best.

Hi everyone and thanks for all the replies... i really appreciate them so much...

Since that night that i got drunk, and it doesn't seem possible that its been 3 months ago, i've done alot of thinking about the Church, and, mostly about the Jesus that i learned about as a child.

i am just still trying really hard to not live in fear everyday, fear of death, fear of never seeing family and dear friends.

i am trying to just live each day to the best of my ability...i am a good person, very kind hearted and sweet, at least that's what my friends tell me, and in fact, i have been taken advantage of many times due to my gullible nature and desire to help and befriend others.

i hope that "God" will look upon my heart and see the true me and accept me.

i have gotten drunk only one other time since that night...i am bipolar and take bedtime meds that knock me flat out...if i'm feeling scared or anxious, i'll just take them and go to bed and sleep. i enjoy the occasional drink..which i shouldn't do at all due to the meds i take...but hey, i'm not perfect!! and i agree with Susan D....except when you don't remember the experience the next day!!!

thanks again everyone!...my computer's in the hospital, so i only have one hour a day here at the library...i don't think i've written a sober intro yet, but i will!!

PL

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Searching for the real TRUTH

Congratulations. You have begun the dance to remember. KNOW THIS> THE CHURCH IS NOT GOD. The church (or any other dogma for that matter) is part of the veil that needs to be lifted from our eyes so that we can experience the reality that IS heaven. The Mormon church isn't bad or good. It has served it's purpose in your life and you are growing beyond it. You are waking up. Pay attention and trust the deepest voice within you that you can hear. HINT: if it is a fear it isn't real, go deeper.

Heh, the new REM video "Loosing My Religion" came on the TV as I made my first post-active drink. GOD it felt good...

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It's just a ride, it's just a ride
no need to run, no need to hide
It may feel so real inside
but don't forget it's just a ride